The First Healing came after 30 years of suffering non-stop head to toe pain from the so called Fibromyalgia diagnosis. I tried a western medicine approach with pills and diagnostic tests in order to drain my life savings and be told nothing was wrong with me. I stumbled upon energy medicine in a number of formats. Most people shake their head when you talk about energy medicine. Ever try to explain Quantum Physics to someone? Bottom line, with the use of biofeedback, TKM a non-invasive hands-on holistic approach to healing and the realization of my intense need for God to run my life, I was saved for eternity and healed of my pain all from a change in my thought process.
On my last leg
I had to give up my home and my autonomy and move from Florida to Indiana in the dead of winter as I had run out of work I could do from home. I had a head injury from an accident six years ago. I had not held a regular job since and the things that bothered me beyond my ability to cope were growing daily. I ran away twice. Once to live in the middle of 238 acres in Kansas with a man I barely knew and again over the 4th of July as fireworks drove me to distraction. When I ran out of money, I had to return to my mom’s and there awaited an intervention of sorts. My mom and sister were determined to “get me fixed” so that I could live normally and get a job and be out on my own. And thus began my second major healing.
It was major to be without pain and it was pure joy to know God on a personal level. But there was an overriding level of blah. I felt a disconnect. I was not happy with my life although it had improved in epic proportions. I desired so much more but I could never seem to achieve it. My overriding thought was how I was not worthy, was not worth the effort.
I set out to get fixed. I thank the Lord above that no one from the medical establishment of western medicine would treat me. Interesting that I submitted to them hundreds of pages of testing I had done after the accident with the brain injury. In summary all the doctors could come up with to say was that I was an extremely complex and confusing case. When I put this in front of neurologists, neurosurgeons and neuropsychologists and said I did not want another test, I wanted a solution to my brain function issues and my sensory overload. Every one of them said they had no ability to help with that!
I knew the solution would come from energy medicine. I had used TKM to solve the physical pain issues. I had not used TKM for emotional issues per se. I did learn in my studies that all illness and dysfunction begins with a thought and then there is a corresponding reaction to the thought in the form of an emotion. As these emotions manifest, stress is put on the body and enough “stinkin thinkin” and the body breaks down and illness sets in. I did understand that much.
I felt sure a new set of TKM procedures would fix me. I wrote to Jim Robertson, of the King Institute in Sebring. He is the man I made the first appointment with for a TKM session. The same man who offered the invitation of attending a TKM training session at his church. The same man who posed enough questions that the light bulb went off and I realized the immense need for God to run my life. I sent Jim all my western medicine test results from an 8 hour neuropsych exam. I added great commentary on what I thought was the problem.
The letter I could not understand
He wrote back after quite some time and said “I have studied the reports you sent me and find them very revealing. It is obvious that you have been chasing a cure for your condition for most of your life. Rather than make suggestions to you regarding supplements or some form of organic protocol I am going to focus my comments on a simple truth on which I have built my whole practice. That truth is that as we think so is our heart. In other words all disease and illness begins as a thought. To reverse the illness we have to identify the thought, learn to recognize the thought as it occurs (usually out of our awareness), then replace the thought with a new thought. This is nicely illustrated by the Apostle Paul’s discussion of his “thorn in the flesh.” Paul refers to his thorn in the flesh as a messenger of Satan. What else is a messenger from Satan but those thoughts we hold that are inconsistent with the truth of who we are and whose we are. Paul asked God to remove it three times but God told him “My grace is sufficient.” In other words Paul was told to stop focusing on the messenger from Satan and focus on God’s grace.
When we are conceived and begin to develop in the womb we are influenced by everything that takes place in the lives of our parents. Energetically, we are affected by our mother’s thoughts, emotions and of course diet and health practices. We can be imprinted by negative as well as positive emotions. When we are born the process continues as we experience contact with those around us. We begin to build a belief system even before we have language to describe it. Certain stimulus promotes a corresponding emotional reaction of either fear or contentment and peace (the product of loving contact.)”
Remove the grave clothes
He also stated that while I had accepted Jesus as my savior, I had yet to fully realize what it means to have Him accept me as one of his sheep. “In order to be truly free to a life more abundant, you have to take off the grave clothes that are holding you in bondage.” He went on for 7 pages and I was disappointed, disillusioned and bottom line, I did not understand at all what he was talking about. I even responded and asked him to make it simple and apply it to me. He let me be for quite some time to stew and ponder.
At the same time I saw a Christian counselor. The most important aspect of the counseling was identification of my distorted thinking called Cognitive Distortions. There are ten forms of self-defeating thoughts. My counselor said she would look for scriptural references and encouragement to help overcome these thought distortions. I appointed myself the task to research scripture that would help me overcome these cognitive distortions.
My church and connection group
Pastor Gary Walker gave me a book The Bondage Breakers by Neil Anderson. I read it several years ago when Jim Robertson gave it to me. I re-read it realizing again how desperately I needed to be reminded of how to overcome negative thoughts and irrational feelings.
I was brave enough to share my challenges with my church and my small groups. Others began to pray for me. I felt loved and part of a significant spiritual family.
As I read three books all at the same time that Pastor Gary had picked out for me, I concentrated on what was possible in being able to renew the mind. Even the bible said the battle is fought and won in the mind. In my path to studying scripture which would help me change my distorted thinking, I discovered how wonderful it is to read different translations. I use Biblegateway.com and I like
New International Version – NIV New Living Translation – NLT
Easy to Read Version – ERV New American Standard – NAS The Message – MSG
These were the first two scriptures I researched when God put it on my heart to explore the power of our mind.
Renew Your Mind- The battle is fought and won in the mind
Romans 12:1-2 New International Version (NIV)
A Living Sacrifice
12 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
Romans 12:1-2 New Living Translation (NLT)
A Living Sacrifice to God
12 And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
Romans 12:1-2 The Message (MSG)
Place Your Life Before God. So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.
Think About These Things
Philippians 4:4-9 New International Version (NIV)
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
Philippians 4:4-9 New Living Translation (NLT)
Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.
Philippians 4:4-9 The Message (MSG)
Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you’re on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute!
Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.
Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.
Labels and their negativity
Only a change of mind and heart would free me from the bondage of the labels I listed in all my writings. When I moved from Florida to Indiana in utter defeat, I was labeled as brain injured with a sensory processing disorder. Once my sister fully understood my limitations she started to suggest I apply for disability! I was diagnosed with obsessive compulsive personality disorder, anxiety and depression in a 20 page neuropsych exam. No wonder I was ready to dig the hole. I was bombarded with negative thoughts and labels which confirmed all the things I felt I could NOT do. On top of that, I felt worthless and a failure who fit nowhere.
I was blind but now I see
At church we studied John 9:25. It is the story about a blind man who Jesus restored sight to. As we discussed the story of how the Pharisees were arguing about Jesus, they questioned the former blind man and the man replied “once I was blind but now I see.” And suddenly in the blink of an eye, I understood all I had been studying. Jim Robertson’s words finally made sense.
As you think, so you will be
This is the very simple statement from Proverbs 23:7. I shed the grave clothes. I carefully watch those thoughts I allow to enter my mind. I threw away the labels and I started to live. I examine every action and thought and consider what Jesus would do. I am quietly living and loving the Lord allowing Him to direct my path. The best is yet to come!